As a woman in her 40s, I've learned a lot of lessons in my lifetime. Through parenting, a career change, marriage, friendships, experiences, and challenges, I have learned how to become a stronger, more healthy version of myself in every way. I've definitely learned from my mistakes and have made the concerted effort to change my responses to situations in order to protect my mental and physical well-being. Thinking back on the pathways that my 40+ years of my life has taken me, I have developed some tips to live by. I would like to share these tips with you in hopes that they inspire and encourage you wherever you are in your own journey of life.
Every day is a new start. This tip has been really comforting for me. There have been many days where I have failed to text or call a friend, spend quality time with my family, squeeze some exercise in for the day, or keep up with healthy eating. Instead of letting feelings of guilt and failure creep in, I have learned that it's okay to not be at my best performance every single day - that there will be days where I can't do everything and I will make choices that maybe aren't the best. Grace is something that I have had to definitely give myself in order for those negative feelings to stay at bay. So I encourage you to give yourself some grace for those not-so-great days and to be mindful that every day is a new start.
You're never too old to begin a new path. This calls for a change in mindset!! I find that many people don't bother changing their circumstances because they think "why bother?" Or what about this one: "I'm too old." I remember encouraging a friend of mine several years ago to join me for the Warrior Dash (a 5 km run with obstacles). Her immediate response as a 50+ year old woman was "I'm too old for that." Others may be hindered by fear of change, as the unknowns of change can be daunting at times. This type of mindset will unfortunately keep people stagnant, and possibly unhappy, in their journey of life. After being a teacher with the public school board for 19 years, I decided to resign and focus on what I'm truly passionate about: health and fitness. It was a process of sacrifice and patience, but I'm at complete peace with the choice that I made. Whether you may be wanting a change in career or beginning a new habit or moving to another city/country, I encourage you to take the leap of faith and begin the new path!
Find the right tribe. Wow.. this tip has been a game-changer for me! I have learned to surround myself with positive people who will encourage me and support me no matter what. In order to get to this point in my life though, I had to graciously let go of toxic friendships. And since I've done so, it's been a breath of fresh air!
Don't ever quit. This is much easier when you have the right tribe in your life. If you have a goal in mind, find the right people who will support you, encourage you, and hold you accountable in reaching your goal. Often times, people will set unrealistic, long term goals. Smaller, more attainable goals should be the focus, as they will be less challenging to achieve.
Let it go. (Yes, you can start singing the song now... haha!) Holding onto offence can be very detrimental to not only our mental health, but also our physical health. Staying offended often leads to bitterness, anger, resentment, or jealousy - all of the toxic feelings that will literally destroy our mental well-being and possibly show up in a variety of illnesses throughout our bodies. I have learned to let go of offence through recognizing that the person being rude obviously has some things in their life that are not healthy. Changing the perspective from "me"-focused to the person being rude helped me to understand that their decision to be unkind came from their own unhealthy state. Their decision to be unkind was still wrong, but my response to it was not one of dwelling on it but rather letting it go.
Have fun and laugh a lot. As a mother and wife, I have made the point of being silly, letting loose, and making my family laugh pretty much every day. "Laughter is good medicine", as they say. And I would definitely agree! Laughter boosts moods, changes the atmosphere, and also, as a bonus, works out the abdominal muscles!!
So there you have it. The tips that have been absolutely life-changing for me. The tips that have protected my mental health through the ups and downs of my life. My hope is that you internalize these tips and begin making the effort of implementing them in your life.
I promise... you won't regret it!
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